Shyness/anxiety at work

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Lucy Rawlings — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 11:33:55 GMT

I was also very shy when i first started and still am to an extent now! I completely understand your situation as just the other day i was told i look 'shifty' if i look around the prep room when going to get a bucket to clean waiting room. I know this was only a joke but it is now an ongoing one and is not great to tell such a paranoid person such as myself. I have found that i am shy around certain people, whereas others can relate to the paranoia/shyness or anxiety as they too have experienced it at some point. I can totally sympathise with you.

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Phrin Vernon RVN — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 23:50:52 GMT

I'm a bit concerned that I have killed this thread!

How are you doing Shelly?

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Phrin Vernon RVN — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 22:55:36 GMT

[quote user="Phrin SVN"]

[quote user="mrs mac"]

[quote user="xXx Cat xXx"]

[quote user="mrs mac"]

That was/is an issue for me too. I try to keep up with ex work colleagues but it isnt always easy!

[/quote]

It's not always easy but you try which is a very positive thing

xXx

[/quote]

I think the longer you leave it the more apprehension/nerves build (which I know sounds stupid as you're meeting friends- but thats how it can be with me anyway). Im a particularly wonky donkey today it has to be said.

[/quote]

So true regarding the time thing!

I too have real problems at work - I'm naturally shy - though none of my colleagues would believe you! The reason they wouldn't believe you? I cannot stand seeing things being done substandard, but due to my shyness, I have no tact whatsoever, and tend to just explode with frustration, rant and rave, and then feel awful afterwards..... but unfortunatly, I cant back down either, unless I am in the wrong, so my poor colleagues have to endure my ranting, usually carried out with zero tact.

not good, and doesn't earn me any brownie points :( even though, frustratingly, I am only trying to ensure the best possible care for the patient

grrrrrrr at myself!

[/quote]

Must try and redeem myself though, and say that if I have done wrong, or can be proved wrong in my 'opinions' (usually regarding circuits, contact times, GA monitoring & patient handling), then I will immediately back down and apologise!

Still not good though!

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Phrin Vernon RVN — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 22:50:11 GMT

[quote user="mrs mac"]

[quote user="xXx Cat xXx"]

[quote user="mrs mac"]

That was/is an issue for me too. I try to keep up with ex work colleagues but it isnt always easy!

[/quote]

It's not always easy but you try which is a very positive thing

xXx

[/quote]

So true regarding the time thing!

not good, and doesn't earn me any brownie points :( even though, frustratingly, I am only trying to ensure the best possible care for the patient

grrrrrrr at myself!

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Mac Feather — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 21:06:12 GMT

[quote user="xXx Cat xXx"]

[quote user="mrs mac"]

That was/is an issue for me too. I try to keep up with ex work colleagues but it isnt always easy!

[/quote]

It's not always easy but you try which is a very positive thing

xXx

[/quote]

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

xXx Cat xXx — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 20:25:32 GMT

[quote user="mrs mac"]

That was/is an issue for me too. I try to keep up with ex work colleagues but it isnt always easy!

[/quote]

It's not always easy but you try which is a very positive thing

xXx

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Mac Feather — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 14:25:37 GMT

[quote user="xXx Cat xXx"]do not interact with them outside work partly because I live so far away [/quote]

That was/is an issue for me too. I try to keep up with ex work colleagues but it isnt always easy!

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

xXx Cat xXx — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 22:48:26 GMT

I was shy when I started as a trainee as I didnt know enough to explain to clients about there pets condition so I got a qualified to explain but I listened to what was being said and kept notes on things they were saying. I still do this if it is a procedure that I am not familiar with. I love my work colleagues but do not interact with them outside work partly because I live so far away but also due to being caught out in previous jobs being friends outside work has put me in difficult positions in the past.

Your work ethics are very good and you want to learn and if you are not already attending college then this will also help as the knowledge you gain you will use in practise. Some of my colleagues love it when I come in from college and tell them what I learnt and it reminds them and keeps them up dated.

Speak with your head nurse and if you need to speak with your doctor they maybe able to help.

Lots of us on here have similar problems and are always around to help. Feel free to PM me if u want.

All the best and take care

Tracy

xXx

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Sam Leeks — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 22:29:18 GMT

I used to be quite similar to you and in some respects i still am. My boyfriend always moans when we're out that i dont talk to people, and even on work nights out i dont really interact with work colleages....and yet when i'm "vet nurse Sam" i'm totally different. i can talk to people about anything and it doesnt bother me. When i first started work, prob for the first 6months i didnt really interact with the people i worked with, i got on with the job that i was supposed to do but thats it. It gets better! the more experience and more knowledge u gain the better u feel about yourself. Self conifdence is half the battle!

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Honeybadger — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 21:38:24 GMT

I think that if ever you are not sure about something that someone asks you there is no shame in saying that you are not sure and asking advice from someone else. I have heard people make things up in the past becuase they didnt know the answer!

Regarding your shyness. Try not to worry, you will settle in in your own time. I'm sure your colleages respect the hard work you do and over time you will get to know them better and feel more happy.

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

am.coulson — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 21:26:23 GMT

OMG!!! You sound very similar to the way I am.!!! I get on vey well with my colleagues, but I do get nervous around clients, and find sometimes like i've been "caught out" when they ask me a question, and then I feel like I'm waffling and making things confusing. I also hate phoning clients in certain situations. Perhaps try doing what I started doing and it works for me... I write down in bullett points and in order of relevance what I need to say, and try to make myself as clear as possible to try and minimise the need for the client to ask questions. I try to see it from their perspective and think what questions I would ask. I find speaking calmly and confidently after taking a deep breath helps. I'm sure you're fine, and try to break the habit of going over things in your head. Someone told me taht whats said is said and you can't change it so there's no point!!! I agree talking to your head vn or your boss to go over things you're not sure about would be good, as it would boost your confidence. I suppose the jist of it is.. slow down!!!

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Kim Buckley — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 21:02:13 GMT

I've worked with quite a few shy nurses. One of them was exactly like you have said but over time her confidence grew and she also became a completely different person.

I can understand the not wanting to phone owners regarding procedures as I agree that you should know what you are talking about. Maybe you could tell you head nurse about this concern and they could actually teach you a bit about routine procedures to boost your confidence?

Don't worry though! You are obviously doing a good job and as you learn more your confidence will grow. Good luck

Re: Shyness/anxiety at work

Doolally — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 20:58:28 GMT

:cuddle: I used to be just the same. My ex boyfriend's friend's used to think that I was up myself and thought i was too good to talk to them, when in reality i was so shy I just couldn't talk to them. I always hated using the phone and up until I was 18+ would always get my mum to phone people for me, if she couldn't then i'd spend ages rehearsing what I was going to say.

But now I actually love client interaction, I love talking to people on the phone, I love giving advice. If all the attention is on me I sometimes get into a muddle and want to crawl away and hide, but conversely I like teaching and would love to do some lecturing!

Take the pressure off yourself, you get shy people and loud people and there's nothing wrong being the shy one.

I still struggle with small talk and although I can hold my own with a loud person, I do sometimes struggle to be the one filling the silence if i'm left doing the small talk with another quiet person.

To be honest, I don't really know how or why I changed. Part of it is confidence, the more you learn the more comfortable you'll feel talking to people about work matters. So if you're not confident talking to an owner about a procedure say so and see if you can listen to a QVN talking to them so you can pick up tips. The longer you work with people the more you'll get to know people, get to know their lives outside work and find things to talk to them about, my common interest with people is often horses so if someone has a horse i can talk to them for hours!!! Part of it is developing a don't give a f**k attitude, not in a bad way, but really if i'm working my hardest and i'm happy with my work i don't care what anyone else thinks of me.

You do have interesting things to say, so if someone asks how your weekend was, tell them and ask how theirs was....or is there's an awkward silence ask how their weekend was etc.

The most important thing is to not worry. Easier said than done, but I think confidence is a self esteem thing, and if you're beating yourself up over it then you won't be confident. I used to have rubbish self esteem, but I'm very happy with myself now (lol!), I can't entirely tell you how I got here, but part of it is achieving my dreams, gaining qualifications etc, so keep on in there