Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Kim Buckley — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 19:24:17 GMT

I feel like she's only invited me coz she feels like she had to.

A friend is for life, not just for your wedding!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Sal the 1st — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 22:05:19 GMT

[quote user="Bouncyfi"]

This may not be what you want to hear but I feel sorry for your friend (or ex friend) I would assume that this is her first marriage (hopefully her only one) and that she's taken the step to invite you. Your boyfriend has a birthday every year. I would be feeling mighty peeved if a friend did this to me. Everyone can't be invited to a wedding so I always take an invite as something extra special, like they actually think enough of me to invite along. It's not like you're a relative who they have to invite - you're a friend and she wanted you there.

Its a shame that you're not going and losing a friend over this - it was only one day out of your whole future with your boyfriend. And if he was a great bloke he would have understood and put off anything that was planned.

Hopefully your boyfriend will be around for as long as your friend was!

Its not about "she never makes time for me" or anything like that - she is getting married so her head with have been up her a rse since they named the day.

[/quote]

yes I would agree.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Fiona Leathers — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 22:00:05 GMT

Hopefully your boyfriend will be around for as long as your friend was!

Its not about "she never makes time for me" or anything like that - she is getting married so her head with have been up her a rse since they named the day.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Polly P — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:53:37 GMT

Sounds like more frenemies than friends, whoever's right or wrong... Looks like you should both accept you're not really friends any more and move on...

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Kim Buckley — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:49:24 GMT

She's done it to my mum and sister aswell. Oh well.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Sal the 1st — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:22:09 GMT

[quote user="Kimbo1985"]

Well she's now set her facebook so I can't see anything. Don't know if she's actually mature enough to be getting married if you ask me!!

[/quote]

maybe she figured you werent that interested so didnt need to see it?

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Caro Laithwaite VN — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:20:24 GMT

So long as she isnt marrying your family you should be safe

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Kim Buckley — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 20:56:33 GMT

Well she's now set her facebook so I can't see anything. Don't know if she's actually mature enough to be getting married if you ask me!!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

loopylou711 — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 20:42:47 GMT

I fell out with a girl i had been friends with 10 years! The reason was simply because she got jealous when i started seeing my bf. I saw her more than my bf so no idea wht her problem was. Our little group split down the middle, my other friend met her bf about then aswell and i think it just jealousy! But basically, i think u can be friends for however any years and things will change and so will people!

Best to move on!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Vicky RVN — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 19:31:47 GMT

[quote user="Kimbo1985"]She def isn't the person I was friends with when I was little [/quote]

People change a lot as they grow up (or should i say get older). I've now lost contact with the people i grew up with, i only keep in contact with people who i became friends with in senior school/college/work. I had a best friend right from play school to half way through senior school. We were totally inseparable, but we grew apart. Ended up arguing all the time like an old married couple or something!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Kim Buckley — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 19:16:40 GMT

Sorry not been on here for a couple of days as my laptop has died :(

Thanks for everyones comments. I can see why she might be upset about me not going but the only time I hear from her these days is if I get in touch and even then it's all pretty one sided. If I'm completely honest I don't really feel like I want to go anyway as it would feel pretty fake seeing as I've not seen her for a year!! ( I worked it out). She met her fiance through me and pretty much dumped me out of her life when she met him. I know this does happen but I don't think it shows her to be a very good friend if you ask me. I have made a massive effort to make sure I've not done this since meeting my bloke. She also used to make me feel bad for not having a bf and would say things like "oh don't worry you'll find someone soon!". It always made me feel like she's better than me.

Oh well what's done is done and she may be upset but I'm sure she'll get over it. She def isn't the person I was friends with when I was little

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Fiona Leathers — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 16:49:01 GMT

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]

[quote user="mrs mac"]

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]Well im getting married in Scotland[/quote]

Im nosey Faye- where in Scotland are you getting married?

[/quote]

lol New Lanark Mill Hotel

[/quote]

My friend got married there in Sept and it was glorious! Take a walk up to the falls, cos it was just lovely!! You'll have a great time! The staff were excellent and make sure you get pictures taken on the roof garden, views were amazing!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Faye Sewell — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 10:11:05 GMT

[quote user="loopylou711"]

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]my best friend lives in Belgium[/quote]

Am nosier! Where in Belgium does your friend stay? My bfs mum stays in Leuven, the home of Stellla! Get some not bad trips away!

[/quote]

she lives in Corroy le Grand a nice big country house!!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Faye Sewell — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 10:03:51 GMT

[quote user="mrs mac"]

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]Well im getting married in Scotland[/quote]

Im nosey Faye- where in Scotland are you getting married?

[/quote]

lol New Lanark Mill Hotel

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Caro Laithwaite VN — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 09:09:11 GMT

If a person l called a friend had made no effort to meet my partner under the circumstances mentioned when they live 5mins away then l would not give up my holiday for them.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

loopylou711 — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 00:24:25 GMT

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]my best friend lives in Belgium[/quote]

Am nosier! Where in Belgium does your friend stay? My bfs mum stays in Leuven, the home of Stellla! Get some not bad trips away!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Mac Feather — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 22:42:53 GMT

[quote user="Faye Eaton"]Well im getting married in Scotland[/quote]

Im nosey Faye- where in Scotland are you getting married?

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Mac Feather — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 22:42:06 GMT

Having read the last 3 comments, I can see both sides. Your friend will prob be stressed with the wedding stuff, it can be a stressy time.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Faye Sewell — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 21:01:55 GMT

Well im getting married in Scotland in Sept, 6hrs away from all my family and my best friend lives in Belgium now who I have know for 25yrs, if she didnt come I would be gutted and vise versa for hers!!. So please think about it is what I would say!!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Louise B — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 20:46:14 GMT

[quote user="Gillian Mostyn"]

You know me...devil's advocate....but....

....could she feel that you are putting a relatively recent boyfriend before her when she has been your friend for years? Not saying who or what is right...just a thought?

[/quote]

That's what I was thinking too. I would go to the friend's wedding and give the boyfriend a slightly later treat.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Gillian Mostyn — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 15:45:52 GMT

You know me...devil's advocate....but....

....could she feel that you are putting a relatively recent boyfriend before her when she has been your friend for years? Not saying who or what is right...just a thought?

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Vicky RVN — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 13:10:32 GMT

[quote user="Caro Laithwaite"]

A friend is someone who is there if you saw them a day before or 5 years. They understand not everything in life is under your control.

[/quote]

I agree with this!

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Mac Feather — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 12:58:26 GMT

[quote user="Kimbo1985"]childhood friends[/quote]

I think people change and move on over time. Its a sad but true fact that some friendships dont last.

I also think planning a wedding can bring out the worst in some people.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Caro Laithwaite VN — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 00:58:01 GMT

A friend is someone who is there if you saw them a day before or 5 years. They understand not everything in life is under your control.

This doesnt sound like much of a friend. So ditch them and move on. dont waste money on a gift as it would not be appreciated and as you are feeling upset you would probably pay a lot of money for it. Course you may not bother but sounds like you think more of the friendship than she did.

She doesn't deserve your time so don't waste it on her.

Re: Friend making me feel bad/angry!

Anonymous — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 22:04:38 GMT

[quote user="Kimbo1985"]

One of my childhood friends is getting married in July and I sent her a card to say sorry I wouldn't be able to go as my bf and I are going away for his b-day which is 4 days after the wedding and we can only get a flight the day before.

I get a shitty text today saying that she's shocked I'm not going seeing as I was sent a card 6 months ago telling me when it was. This made me really angry because I told her why and it's not like I can change when my bf's bday is! Plus she hasn't even met my bf even though we've been together over a year and she lives 5 minutes up the road! She can't be bothered with me anymore and I've given up trying to make an effort with her so I don't know why she expects me to drop everything to go to her wedding. Grrr! I didn't text back but I was very tempted! Am I being out of order for feeling like this?

[/quote]

Sounds like a case of the bridezilla hun I wouldn't worry about it. Remember this is HER big day and EVERYONE is against HER! I imagine once it all boils over she will understand and move on. But if she doesn't I would really be thinking if she's the sort of friend I would want to have in my life. The world doesn't revolve round her and you need to be able to have a life too. I would just ignore her, I'm sure other things will occupy her mind and time soon with planning a wedding and all! enjoy your trip with your bf :)