Why now?

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 17:39:51 GMT

[quote user="mrs mac"]

How are you doing Emma?

[/quote]

Stressed

He is staying where he is for now, won't take it any further as he doesn't want to rock the boat. I have him looking for other jobs though. I am still worried about the money situation but what can I do? I can't make him do anything. Urgh.

Thank you for caring, it means a lot it really does.

Re: Why now?

Mac Feather — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 16:57:42 GMT

How are you doing Emma?

Re: Why now?

Vicky RVN — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 19:24:41 GMT

I have no advice to offer different to what others have said, just wanted to say i hope things work out in the end. I would say your partner should keep looking for other jobs, sounds like his workplace isn't a good place to be x

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 17:59:50 GMT

Thank you Stella, it means a lot.

And I will Caro, I am furious about it all, it can't be legal the way they have done it. They know nothing different now from when they took him on.

Re: Why now?

Caro Laithwaite VN — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 17:03:46 GMT

Get legal advice before accepting anything.

Re: Why now?

Stella Skelton RVN — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 13:17:05 GMT

Hi,

I'm really sorry to hear about your troubles. At least he's still got a job for now which means it's better that some money is coming in rather than none at all. But maybe he should keep looking for and applying for jobs until he gets a better one and leave this current job as soon as he can. It doesn't seem like a very good place to work which can impact greatly on your homelife if one of you is terribly unhappy at work. Trust me!!

Good luck sweetheart! And do have a Merry Christmas. I know money is horrible to deal with - we never have anything spare at the end of every month...it's been like that for a while...but just watch your spending - people will understand - and enjoy being with your family and friends when you get the opportunity. It'll take your mind of things - which is what everybody needs now and again!!! xxx

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 13:03:04 GMT

He has not been 'let go', but they are moving him to another job with a significant pay cut so it will still be a similar situation. We struggle to get by now, I hope I can recalculate everything to make it fit. I am really angry, none of this seems fair. If I can take this further I will.

Re: Why now?

Saskia Quinn — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 10:44:36 GMT

Whatever happens Emma, you will get through it - you have to.

Thinking of you

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 08:03:58 GMT

Thank you all.

Meeting is at 10.30 this morning so got to go to work and try to act normal until we know whats going on. I feel sick, I can't see how to manage without the money coming in.

Re: Why now?

les punton — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:30:54 GMT

aww im so sorry to hear that, they dont seem to have taken the correct approach re training etc, its completely pants that its this time of year.

my bf was off during summer due to op and we were really struggling, we went to CAB and they were great, very understanding and still working with us now. I strongly urge you and other half to go and see them as everyone else has said too.

Every year I think its going to be a better year, however there still always seems to be something! I know its easy for me to say as its not my situation (this time) but even if the meeting doesnt go well t/m, he should maybe keep looking for a new job? .......it may open up new avenues, although it doesnt feel like that just now

chin up, thinking of you xx

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:09:47 GMT

Thank you Caro - I have spent the day trying to work through that site in between other bits, once he gets home I hope we can sit down and see what they have done and what they have done wrong.

Thanks all.

Re: Why now?

Caro Laithwaite VN — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:04:34 GMT

It may be a bit late but he can demand legal help check out the acas site. if not offered the chance or was declined if he asked he may have a case, he can also defer he doesn't have to do it when told so long as he can give a reason and a suitable .time for reschedule.

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:57:22 GMT

Its very much not like that. Last year was awful, as was the one before, I was really holding out for this one being good, a little bit of time to spend at home and happy. Now this will hang over whatever we do and I just can't get past it. I was so looking forward to all the prep today, I have just drifted through in a daze between talking to the mortgage people about possible mortgage holidays... not quite the plan.

Re: Why now?

Mac Feather — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:10:09 GMT

[quote user="SaskiaVN"]you are not alone[/quote]

I second that. I think we all have 'our stuff' to deal with along lifes way and its so good to have a place like this to be able to turn to. I do think this time of year magnifies emotions, like we are all meant to have a jolly old time but life isnt like that.

Re: Why now?

Sally Howe — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 14:20:37 GMT

Not anything to say that hasn't been said.

Re: Why now?

Saskia Quinn — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 13:58:02 GMT

yeah, life can change so quickly. Easy for me to say, but if anything is going to happen, it wont be until after christmas - I know thats not much consolation, but you have the day off to write your cards and wrap presents etc, so try and get that done and do your best to put it to the one side for now.

As I said, it is easy for me to say that, I am actually off work today as I have been unwell during the night and this morning. I think I am completely stressed out and exhausted by everything my ex has and still is putting me and my boys through and it has finally taken its toll on me.

I am not taking away from your problem, just sort of letting you know that you are not alone I guess and we are all here to offer you moral support and try and get you through this - dont forget that!

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 13:49:56 GMT

He is just fishing for information today, trying to find out exactly what it is he is meant to have done. The meeting is tomorrow.

I really hope thats the case, it has just put a real downer on everything. Yesterday I was more worried about what to wear for the Christmas do, funny how things change.

Re: Why now?

Saskia Quinn — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 13:44:59 GMT

Sorry to hear that Emma

I hope he gets on ok today. Things are sometimes not as bad as they seem and most of the time we can find a way out (take it from one who knows!)

Keep us posted and keep talking, we are here to listen

Re: Why now?

Mac Feather — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 11:49:09 GMT

Sorry to hear that.

Yes defo go to C.A.B and get further advice.

Good that he is applying for other jobs though, good that he is angry rather than floored by it.

Keep talking cause if you bottle it up its not good for anyone especially yourself. (I should take my own advice on bottling things up.)

Take care.

Re: Why now?

Emma Purnell — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 10:57:17 GMT

I am fairly sure he didn't ever have one, I must look into that.

I will head him that way, he is just obviously pretty stubborn at the moment being so angry and fed up. Wrapping Christmas presents never felt so empty!

Re: Why now?

A Little TLC — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 10:55:06 GMT

Oh hun, you poor thing...

First thing, did your partner get given a training schedule? If not, he should have been, but if yes, good.

That means he can prove its not his fault. We had this issue where i am at the moment, its should be the trainers problem, not his.

As long as he has shown he is keen to learn, and that he has asked, it not his fault if the people mean to train, either could'nt be bothered or 'didnt have time'.

If he doesn't have a training schedule, he needs to make the point that he should have had one.

He could also go to Citazen's advice.

i'll try and think of the other things, my brain is a bit fried at the moment. x