Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Mac Feather — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 14:39:45 GMT

Maybe you need some time to yourself,time to think.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Vicky RVN — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 14:00:29 GMT

In no way do you come across as whingy or stupid! You just sound very cofused about what you want. To me it sound like you need to get away from him, that things aren't going to get better for you while you're with him. The college course will still be there in a few years time if you still want to do it when you've settled down and saved money for it.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Heather Christie — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 11:43:09 GMT

I'm torn. I have a gut feeling is that bf is an a*se and that i want to be as far away from him as possible. I'm fed up of crying and always being scared that he'll kick me out if i do something he doesn't like. I'm not exactly thrilled that i'll be at his mercy for the 2 years this course will take. Then another little voice pops into my head saying that i can't do the college course without him supporting me (which i'm constantly scared he'll turn around and say he doesn't want to do anymore) and that all the vet practises will turn me down as i've only ever worked at a kennels before (as a volunteer) and they'll think i'm not serious about wanting a career as a VN. The voice also says that i've already told the college i'll go, already brought the stuff and that it'd all be a waste if i never showed up there. Plus, i've seen the college and i love it. They've got all kinds of cool animals there.

I'm sorry if this comes across as whingy, stupid or just not making sense. I'm just really feeling the stress of it all and it's making me depressed. I cried for 3 solid hours last night. I'm sleeping on sofa cuz bf refuses to apologise for upsetting me, and i'm refusing to sleep in the same bed as him til he does. I'm all over the place at the minute and i just feel so isolated.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Mac Feather — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 11:03:35 GMT

What is your gut feeling, what do you want to do in your heart of hearts?

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Heather Christie — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 10:47:36 GMT

Yeah, i keep thinking about it. Prob is my arguments for going and for staying are kinda circular so i don't really know which one to go for. My friend said to speak to the citizens advice buereau which know about stuff that the government won't tell you about so i'm gonna find out about that.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Mac Feather — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 10:34:07 GMT

Would you consider the Essex kennel job as its live in?

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Heather Christie — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 10:30:06 GMT

And you can't claim income support if you're s student, unless you're a single parent. I checked on the website.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Heather Christie — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 10:28:19 GMT

I'm kinda miserable both ways to be honest. If i stay with him then i get no respect whatsoever and am expected to be his housemaid/babysitter/s*x slave and scapegoat, all rolled into one. If i leave then i've got a load of stress from having no money and being stuck in a job i hate, just to pay the rent. Unless i get lucky and get an animal-related job.It will more than likely involve moving across the country as there never seem to be any positions like that in my area, so i'll prob be homeless until i can find a place. And i won't get to go on the college course that i really want to do as it'll be impossible to study full time and make enough money after classes to pay the rent.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Mac Feather — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 23:00:19 GMT

What do you want to do? What would make you happy?

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Freckle — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 22:35:24 GMT

maybe think about it this way.... everything happens for a reason - maybe a svn position will turn up and you will be glad you didn't move away.

as for the boyf - i havent read any other threads, but if he is horrid to you, then get rid!

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

paula morgan — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:20:19 GMT

Whats to love if hes horrible!!

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Fleabee99 — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:18:47 GMT

you can pm me if you wana talk about it ive had my fair share of bastards

take care of yourself xx

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Heather Christie — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:15:43 GMT

Hmm the nice ones always seem ok at the start but by the time i realise they're horrible, i've already fallen in love.

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

paula morgan — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:14:07 GMT

I totally agree, Kick him to the kerb girl!!

Re: Sometimes i just wanna cry....

Fleabee99 — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:10:04 GMT

if hes so horrid, dump him, life is too short hunni, the nice ones come along after the pricks, at least he did for me, 5 years on were still very happy