Am I wasting myself?

RE: Am I wasting myself?

Ian M — Sun, 04 Sep 2022 19:59:51 GMT

This topic in slightly different guises comes up frequently and I have seen it regularly here over the 20 years I have been on this forum.

Although I mostly left nursing in 2001 I returned last year for a year, partly to see if I could still do it and also to refresh my skills. To be honest, the same negatives are there except the gammony racist clients are a bit more subtle than before, the demands are greater and the dishonesty at recruitment about actual hours and OOH commitment was audacious. I am thus about to leave clinical to work in a charity role that will pay me about 70% more than the RVNs in the same organisation, for working less hours and likely not as hard as they do although my role will probably have wider and more far reaching impact.. I suspect I will be a lot happier.

RE: Am I wasting myself?

Alison Clare Hickman — Sat, 03 Sep 2022 09:07:30 GMT

Aw dear, bless you and many hugs Sarah Trebble hope this is your tag!

Good luck with your new venture and for sure wish you find a far far happier place!!!

RE: Am I wasting myself?

sarahkat — Sat, 03 Sep 2022 04:30:57 GMT

There are so many of us! I just wish that they would see that and try to retain us, it feels a bit like we are disposable or have a "shelf life"

I have found a new position at an independent practice (currently corporate) with less hours and lots more staff. So I am hoping that will be the answer for now.

As for the bullying mine too is my direct line manager, the powers that be have tried to sit us down and chat but it never works. She is very old school and resentful and constantly moaning about hating her job. She has discussed me with the team in front of everyone when I am not there and makes snarky remarks frequently. I handed my notice in to the PM who was upset that I was was leaving. Whereas my direct line manager she never even asked why I was leaving, not mentioned anything!

So hopefully soon I will be in a happier place.

Sending hope to all of the wonderful nurses who are struggling XxX

RE: Am I wasting myself?

Gizmo — Fri, 02 Sep 2022 22:47:36 GMT

I hope you can do something about the bullying. I was once in a practice where the bullying came from the top down so I couldn't even bring it up with management.

As for the nursing - I hear you. I qualified 7 years ago and have now come to the point where, although I love nursing, it's just so stressful that I'm wondering if I actually want to do it any more. I'm working in a teaching hospital where comparisons are constantly made between staff, and my skills are withering as favouritism means I don't get to do anything any more other than work in wards - which are often horrifically busy and understaffed. I too am diversifying and I'm finding my stress levels are so much lower on days where I can do the admin work, start and finish on time and don't have to do awkward shifts.

Like Alison, I'm just waiting for job roles to stabilise before beginning to volunteer again with wildlife - which is truly my passion.

I've heard so many nurses say the same thing. The shiftwork, the long hours, the bullying - and the emotional load because we all know it doesn't always end well for our patients. We all put up with the entire downside to nursing because we're compassionate people and want to put forth our best to help those who don't have a voice. We actually deserve better than we get with the current culture - which applies no matter what country you're nursing in. But there comes a point where you have to look after yourself or you can't look after any patient.

RE: Am I wasting myself?

VetNurse Anon a/c — Mon, 08 Aug 2022 15:45:19 GMT

I second what Alison says. Do not put up with bullying. That's utterly dreadful that you're in this position.

When I was debating what to do there are currently so many RVN vacancies so surely there must be somewhere better for you to go.

RE: Am I wasting myself?

VetNurse Anon a/c — Mon, 08 Aug 2022 15:42:37 GMT

Thank you for your reply. It's made me feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one in this situation. I do like my practice and team members and I too was bullied a previous practices and there is none of that where I work.

My other half says that life's too short and I should be happy at work. He remembers all too well me coming home crying day after day whilst working as an RVN.

I hope you manage to succeed in your dream. I'm thinking about looking into studying hydrotherapy

RE: Am I wasting myself?

Alison Clare Hickman — Mon, 08 Aug 2022 13:58:02 GMT

Aw dear me no.

No to bullying. Have you/can you report it? Sometimes though that's just too much to bear and leaving it behind you is the least stressful option. Hugs.

No to exhausting hours where you are required to stay by default as there is no one else to take over. Staying past your contracted hours will happen in our profession - emergencies etc; but it should never be 'the normal'. Not every day/week and ongoing. That's the way to burn out. Staffing levels and/or workload need to be readdressed!!

I always think of it this way ... Would we treat or work an animal this hard? No. We would not. Woof Grrrrrrrrr.

Bless you. I hope you find the happiness you need.

Regards

RE: Am I wasting myself?

sarahkat — Mon, 08 Aug 2022 12:40:24 GMT

I can totally get what both of you are saying. I am currently working in a very busy practice. I am contracted to 40hr week but its always more, the other week I did a ridiculous amount of hours. I am also struggling with bullying and I have just reached the end of my dream job. I have been in practice over 10 years and I am looking at other part time RVN roles but also looking at other jobs. It is a shame but there is no work life balance and to be bullied for doing your job is just too much. I could quite happily just go and do anything as long as it paid the bills.

RE: Am I wasting myself?

Alison Clare Hickman — Mon, 08 Aug 2022 09:39:57 GMT

Hiya,

I feel the same! I am still qualified (keep up with my CPD - occasionally still seeing practice to keep my hand in) but diversified completely. There's part of me that just cannot let go of a role that I worked so hard to qualify in and spent years dedicating myself to.

I am passionate about nursing but truthfully cannot deal with it as my main employment any longer because of the long hours, stress and commitment/strife it can cause. There is definitely more to life and finding the right balance for yourself is key to enjoyment/fulfilment (as well as paying the bills). I have discovered this having been outside of the profession for a similar period as you - it was a shock to my system to start with but having distance really helped me to work out what I need and how I can best use my skills for my 'calling' as a nurse.

So - my goal is now to wait until I have the time to enter a voluntary role in wildlife rehabilitation - I am actively working towards this (baby steps) and it excites me that I will be able to use my skills in an area that I entirely passionate about but will not be my 'job' but my hobby passion. Who knows what will happen? I am excited!

Good luck in whatever you decide to do - my best tip though is to search what makes you happiest.

hth

Ali