Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Alison Clare Hickman — Thu, 07 May 2020 06:00:56 GMT

Agree with apache

With some clarifications...

Clearly it is not time after qualification but practical experience in the job, that counts (many of us worked for years before gaining RVN status). So, for some, a day after qualification prepares you well whilst others need some consolidation with support for a year or five... No one rule fits.

I also agree with all other remarks about self examination/reflection (not castigation, that's so destructive) and how this marks you out as having tip top nursing skills. Where would we be if we didn't think about what we did, how we did it and what we could do differently for an improved outcome?

I do not hold with bullying, harassment or just plain rudeness and snarky behaviour. Poop to those who do this to another fellow human being. However, I can see how frustrations occur when, in a busy environment, there is a feeling the team might not be able to rely on someone they don't (yet) know they can trust the skills of. Trust takes time to earn. As a locum you need to therefore demonstrate minute one (let alone day one) capabilities. It's hard. However, if you have a solid grounding, experience with support when you needed it, *before* launching into locum work, you have, IMO, given yourself a good chance of success in this aspect.

IME, to be fair to the practice, let alone yourself, you need to be a self-cleaning oven, so to speak. Frankly, who wants the stress?! So, get your experience, and with support, under your belt. Happy days.

A practice needs a confident and experienced hand to pick up and run with the ball immediately. They pay locums well for these skills.

Doesn't mean you don't learn new skills or hone those you have already got though. I've added many additional skills through exposure to different working environments and kept existing ones sharpened.

My suggestion is to look for a PT permanent role in nursing. That's definitely what I would do in your circumstances. Plus, talking to any of the wonderful nurses who have offered to do so on here. I think that will give you comfort and perspective.

Stay strong, stay well, keep smiling. You can do this.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

apache — Wed, 06 May 2020 22:59:27 GMT

Personally I do feel locumming at this stage in your career is far from ideal. Have you spoken to any local practices and see if they are interested in a permanent role even if they have to be flexible around uni? Lots of practices crying out for nurses and would rather have someone there 50% of the time.

I do feel that if anyone is working as a locum (nurse or vet) they should be experienced and capable of dealing with most things. Personally I'd like to see a minimum of 5 years qualified, but many won't agree. By the very nature of taking on a locum you are short staffed and need someone who can slot in and just get on with stuff. You also are not in a familiar team where people know your strengths and weaknesses, and are an easy person to blame - as you won't be there next time.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Ian M — Wed, 06 May 2020 21:56:13 GMT

Wanna know a secret? In the old days, it was normal for nurses to not be good at everything. Higher level training and social media has raised expectations. But you're not a machine so you aren't going to be super great at everything and you shouldn't devalue yourself because you aren't. I nursed for years unable to hit a jugular (still can't) but I can single handedly get a blue cannula into a Domitor'd kitten in the front leg but I would still struggle with a saph. I gave up trying to hit jugulars and decided to skill-swap with colleagues. It carried me through 7 years clinical nursing and a couple of locums. I was pretty up front with every employer about my limitations. And I've let veins blow, had animals wake up, and many other horrors I am not going to share.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Tanya Traill — Wed, 06 May 2020 19:58:35 GMT

I could not read this and run as I feel you have been very hard on yourself and some of these nurses around you sound so judgemental.We all make mistakes but it's what we learn from them that makes us good nurses. Nobody knows everything as personally I hate putting in saphenous veins they're really difficult to do and normally tiny veins unless it's a massive dog. Unless you are working in an emergency out of hours vets you rarely do these only because I have been working in an out of hours vets recently and by the time we get patients they have normally only left us minimal working veins.

I have heard of worse mess ups than these and I'm not saying that's good but you are reflecting on what went wrong and trying to make yourself a better nurse.

Please do not give us nursing you sound like the type of nurse I would love to work with. I'm a locum also and have had bad days in the past but the good days make it all worth while.

Feel free to PM me if you want to chat ever.

Were all here for you sending a big virtual hug.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Gizmo — Tue, 05 May 2020 21:15:26 GMT

First of all, you're not alone. I felt exactly the same as a new grad, was mortified that I knew nothing (it wasn't true, but it felt like it when I was surrounded by nurses who'd been at it for donkey's years); couldn't do anything (that wasn't true either but it felt like it when everyone would jump in before me and I got a bit rusty); and would also be light years behind every other new grad in the country (also clearly not true - we're all in the same boat as new grads). I wasn't in a very supportive practice in my first post-grad job - in fact the favouritism and workplace bullying, which came from the top, couple with my lack of confidence, were enough to make me think about quitting the profession. And then I thought - why should I? Why should I let selfish, narrow-minded people put me off following the path I believe I was meant to tread?

You're going to make mistakes. It's a fact of life and - perhaps unfortunately - it's how we learn and grow. As for turning down the iso, that wasn't necessarily a mistake - you were just trying to do the right thing by keeping the inhalant anaesthetic as low as you could and you can't always predict exactly where the right point is for each animal, since they're all individual. It's sad that you had someone so judgemental who could rather have been a bigger person and helped you with the benefit of their experience.

In my book it's the people who castigate themselves for being a bad nurse who actually end up making the best nurses - because they analyse what went wrong, and they're motivated to keep learning and to do better next time. It's those who think they're perfect in everything (and I'm sorry, but they are out there) and think they have nothing else to learn who aren't the best examples of the vet nursing profession.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

James Colver Cert. Ed, RVN — Tue, 05 May 2020 21:05:17 GMT

We all make mistakes, we live and learn :) The fact that you have reflected on what's happened shows that you are a diligent nurse and that is worth so much. And the fact that you have then taken to posting here to ask for advice really does confirm it.

The best nurses, in my opinion, acknowledge that the more they learn, the more they realise they don't know. It's the ones that become cocky and over-confident that worry me.

Nobody knows everything, and you're not expected to.

I don't know if you would like any pointers in hindsight to the examples you have given? For the first, do you have a capnograph? For the second, we all had to do something for the first time once, don't worry about it. And yes, of course it was OK to admit that. The other nurses should have been more supportive, I am sorry that they weren't.

For the last example you gave, and perhaps most importantly of all, it was an oversight, a human error - something that we are all prone to. You have shown that you are able to 'reflect on action' - the next step is to work on 'reflection in action' whih is more difficult - a mindset that you have to try to develop and maintain :)

https://latrobe.libguides.com/reflectivepractice/types

Good luck, and you re welcome to pm me if you would like.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Bantambec — Tue, 05 May 2020 20:45:26 GMT

I feel and do the same, 5y qualified now and btw have only placed 2 saphenous iv's. I dont think the placements you've had have been particularly supportive - I trained in a place like this and it destroyed my confidence and induced paranoia. I left as soon as my npl was complete. I found a new role (in a referral hospital), passed OSCEs first time and have loved it. The support and team work is amazing and actually I am now sole charge in one of their branches.

We all learn from our mistakes, we've all made them. Those who seem perfect have too.

We have a sheet in kennels that has a 24h table, every patient along the top and half hour slots down the side. We write down what is due for the next 24h for each patient. Maybe something like this will help with kennel shifts.

I agree with the previous poster, maybe find somewhere a little more long term x good luck.

Ps, remember vetlife is an amazing resource if you ever feel you need it too x

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Sal the 1st — Tue, 05 May 2020 20:33:01 GMT

everybody makes mistakes - I know I do. Just this morning I filled out a cat vaccination card, the picture of a cat on it should have been 1 big clue, the tick boxes including enteritis, flu and felv should have been another very big clue but no it just didn't filter through this morning. So I filled in the cat vaccination card for a labradoodle puppy called Max. Don't take it to heart we are none of us perfect - I know I'm not

At the moment most people I talk to are feeling a bit down, a bit stressed perhaps not noticing things that they normally would, perhaps being a bit low on patience, a bit snappier, some people not wanting to talk at all - these are not normal times.

Sometimes when we feel a bit low its just easier to recall the little things that didn't exactly go to plan and forget all the really good stuff we do that people appreciate and yet when we look at it ourselves we can't seem to put any great value to it. Making a record of the good stuff as was mentioned earlier is a really good way of reminding yourself that things are not always so bad.I'm on volume 22 at the minute (another plus point gives you loads of material for when you come to write your 'True Confessions of a Vet Nurse'

I will freely admit I'm not as sparky as I would normally be at the moment.

Give me a shout if you feel it would help - keep talking, good things happen when you get it all off your chest

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Samantha Flavell — Tue, 05 May 2020 18:24:31 GMT

Feel free to PM me.

RE: Feel like a rubbish nurse, keep making mistakes

Charlotte Chisholm — Tue, 05 May 2020 11:25:26 GMT

Hi,

I am sorry to hear you are feeling low.

The examples of ‘mistakes’ you listed are likely to have happened to other nurses during their career. Everyone makes mistakes, it is how you learn from them and prevent them happening again that proves your skill.

It is such a high pressure job that it can feel like people are judging you when you say you haven’t done something before - this doesn’t mean you can’t do it, you just need someone to show you first. If it is a busy shift it could be that other staff want the task done NOW! This then causes you more stress.

I know you have to locum but can you pick long term locum positions so you have time to build a bond with the staff? That way when you come across a new task you would be more confident in asking for help. You say you haven’t placed an iv into a saphenous vein before, well at some stage you hadn’t placed one into a cephalic vein either! There will always be a first time you perform a task, it is absolutely OK to read up on the task before to refresh your memory as well as asking for guidance. It is also OK to say no if you don't feel able to, suggest watching this time and try next time.

Have you ever read about imposter syndrome? I came across an article a few years ago and thought ‘it makes sense, this is how I feel’. I bet a lot of nurses feel like you do. I know I always worry if I have done the best job I can do.

I also focus on the negatives, which sounds like you are too. I could have a great day and then a small negative event would completely change my feelings of the whole shift.
How about starting a list or diary of all the good things you are achieving? The procedures that went well, clients that said thank you, patients that you enjoyed nursing. You can look back at it to remind you of the positive aspects of your job.

With regards to thinking you don’t know enough - no one can know everything! This is a job where you will continue to learn every day, so don’t be so hard on yourself!

Well done for reaching out and sharing how you are feeling, feel free to message me if you ever want to chat