How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

fairy — Thu, 23 Nov 2017 14:03:54 GMT

Not much to add but being kind is a huge one, cut some slack if people are having a crisis at home.

Listen to people, don't get too pally because it simply doesn't work (imho) in a managerial position.

Stick up for your staff, ask what interests them and build on that in relation to training and cpd.

book fun days out to help cement the team, keep things confidential and don't get involved in gossip

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

Catriona88 — Wed, 22 Nov 2017 08:07:04 GMT

Yes, as Robyn has said, all your advice has been great! I'm really looking forward to a new challenge and I have taken all your advice on board. I'll keep you updated on how I get on, hopefully I won't be posting in the 'Problem Pages' on a weekly basis, but it's great to know you are all here to help me out!

Feel free to keep sharing advice and words of wisdom.

You are all amazing x

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

Robyn — Tue, 21 Nov 2017 15:58:29 GMT

(This is a super helpful thread - cheers everyone!)

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

Sam.23 — Mon, 20 Nov 2017 14:34:45 GMT

[quote user="Nichola231"]

I try to approach staff and uncomfortable situations with kindness. No one really knows whats going on in peoples lives.

[/quote]

I always think this is a brilliant way to deal with situations like that. It really makes your nurses feel supported and builds trust

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

Alison Clare Hickman — Sun, 19 Nov 2017 11:23:34 GMT

Fab advice Nichola!! Given you my 5* and thumbs up - would u be *my* HN?!

As you have already identified some difficulties and personality types already I feel that's a great start to understanding what motivates (or deters) your team members and will help guide you to create the appropriate level of effective communication with them.

Being a HN (people and processes manager and liaison between team and the bosses) is a difficult role and sometimes a thankless one but if you get the balance between encouragement, auditing, leadership, fun in the madness and group participation right - a very rewarding one.

Nichola is quite right to recommend you involve your management with helping you to encourage a professional job performance from your nurse #4. IME, it has been imminently sensible to realise my own limitations and pass complicated personnel issues upwards and ask for help, or in some extremely difficult/traumatic cases, handing responsibility over completely.

Also agree with WelshyNurse - it is difficult to remain friends when you have to draw lines in the sand as a manager - you lose that 'Them and Us' 'Us' companionship. You are now sometimes going to have to be 'Them'! However it ain't impossible if the respect for one another is maintained and both parties communicate well with one another (i.e. nothing festers, truth is out there and compromise is made when appropriate). Be aware that you have a better chance of making an enemy of a friend if you don't tread carefully with this special relationship and you also have the issue of jealousies amongst other team members if you show favouritism to your friend(s)...

Maybe a sit down over a cup of coffee and a cake with your mates one-one off the premises to discuss these sensitive matters and how they feel about it would be a good idea?

Being a great leader - garnering respect and being an inspiration without burning out...

I learned there was only so much I could do alone - I needed help, support and guidance to lead and manage. In realising I didn't need to be, wasn't expected to be, couldn't possibly be, the be all and end all of *every* personnel issue, or day-day difficulty, was one of the best lessons I learned in becoming a successful people manager. That, and having a senior management support system (VITAL).

I have worked in jobs where senior management support was lacking - no way ideal and my job got too impossible to handle, resulting in obscene stress levels, so I left feeling like a miserable failure.

However, it was when I discovered that by saying "No" or "I need your help to do this" and having a supportive senior management helped me to round off key skills and become a better people and process manager. Yeah, I still had days of tearing out my hair (usually over squabbles amongst the team... Oh Lordy) but in general I had the balance right! I had a creative, focused, fun, hard working, supportive, interested and enthusiastic, loyal team who would come to me to help in times of crisis as well as celebration.

Another suggestion: Nurse 4; can u give them a Special Project to be responsible for? Something to create a feeling in them that u recognise their length of service and 'seniority' and that they are not being overlooked? Possibly melting resistance and disgruntlement (displayed as laziness) and maybe winning (over time) a willing ally? Worth a try?

Maybe share some 'senior' duties with nurse 4 such as organising the rota? Not only will it give the nurse a feeling you trust and respect him/her (important to win them to the Light (sorry - Star Wars reference!) but also enable you to delegate a time consuming job off your plate.... Winner.

Would recommend delegation of jobs whole-heartedly. *All* team members can help you to help them to help the efficient running of the practice by putting each and everybody in charge/being responsible for all kinds of ‘managerial’ duties. Identify who is good at what (eg taking minutes at meetings and typing them up, running regular laboratory audits/checks, responsible for over-seeing theatre maintenance, doing all/part of the insurance claims work...).

Don't think *you* need to do it all! Just make sure your delagatee reports back to you regularly so u have a supervisory overview of it all; 1. for efficiency of purpose, 2. In case of problems 3. So u can report upwards on status as appropriate (eg funding required for a new machine, personnel issues...).

In the long-term having this raft of trained accomplices will help keep things running when you are absent/overloaded; and bring nurses (receptionists, vets et al) forward in their skills to create the next generation of HN/manager. Being given the responsibility of additional skills adds interest to w role and pumps up the person's confidence, when they are doing it well. You Win - They Win - The Practice Wins.

Your primary role? In my book - Monitoring and auditing is specifically *your* role - not the day -to -day 'normal' stuff; unless circumstance dictates (those sh*t hits the fan days ) and you must roll up your sleeves (but temporarily).

I seem to have waffled on way far past my original intention to compliment Nicola in her advice and Welshy nurse for hers... Oops, but I trust some of the said waffle makes sense to you and will help.

You know we are here to help so keep us posted how you go on. (I am particularly interested in the development of nurse 4 and how you navigate the I will remain your friend but am now also your boss journey!).

Good luck, happy Head Nursing and enjoy the ride!!

Ali

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

WelshyNurse — Sun, 19 Nov 2017 09:17:30 GMT

When I was made a manager, I quickly found that you cannot be ‘friends’ as such, especially when you have to address difficult issues.

I would personally tackle #4 first. Although from what you say, this won’t be easy.

RE: How to be a good head nurse and still be friends!?

Nichola231 — Sat, 18 Nov 2017 10:26:50 GMT

Hi. I'm also a newly promoted Head Nurse.

I had already been doing the job for the best part of the year, just without the title. I find pointing out nurses strengths instead of weaknesses helps. But when to comes to discussing those weaknesses, I find it helpful if I allow them to self analyse. I remain open, calm and offer suggestions on how to improve on areas they feel they're struggle with.

I'm guessing there are already nurse duties in place. If not, I assign them according to what they 1 - enjoying doing, 2 - need to get better at and 3 - all the mundane cleaning tasks are evenly spread amongst all staff. If there's anything they are not sure about, I'll show them as many times as needed.

I don't believe in incentive based tasks. I've worked in practices that use this and it creates rivalry. It also demoralises those that have worked hard and not been rewarded for it. Instead, our practice buys everyone take away for lunch once a month. Everyone is treated equally and everyone is rewarded for the hard work that goes in to keeping a practice running smoothly.

I try to approach staff and uncomfortable situations with kindness. No one really knows whats going on in peoples lives. And with so many colleagues struggling with mental health, remaining calm and open works so much better than being the big scary head nurse. If a nurse is having a hard time, I ask them what they need in order to feel better. This puts the responsibility on them and helps them develop good self care skills. For example, I've been struggling with mental health lately and needed more down time in the afternoons. I blocked out my afternoon consults so I had time to sit down, get a proper lunch break and then focus on the ever increasing insurance pile. I explained my need to my colleagues and they were fine with it.

With regards to Nurse #4, I can see your newly appointed role creating an issue. However, management have picked you for a reason. I believe it is up to them to discuss this with her as I'm sure she'll feel overlooked.

I hope there is something in there you can use