My dilemma - advice needed please

RE: My dilemma - advice needed please

VetNurse Anon a/c — Wed, 23 Sep 2015 23:37:10 GMT

Thank you for your replies. I have deleted the original post because I'm a bit paranoid about someone from work reading it but I really appreciate your thoughts and advice.

RE: My dilemma - advice needed please

jojofruits — Wed, 23 Sep 2015 11:10:38 GMT

You absolutely have to put this in a confidential letter to your employers.

Even if she was joking this is a serious thing to say and should be treated as such

RE: My dilemma - advice needed please

Sal the 1st — Sun, 20 Sep 2015 13:11:44 GMT

My suggestions would be vetlife - which you have already put the number out there or Samaritans. I know with Samaritans you could ring them yourself with your concerns (and thsi may help you as well talking this through) and I believe you ?can do the same with vetlife - possibly they could give some ideas on how to tackle this. If you think it would be of use you can PM me

RE: My dilemma - advice needed please

Catherine Raymond — Sat, 19 Sep 2015 15:16:53 GMT

I would sit her down and talk with her. Ask her how she feels and how you can help her. When we are in dark places like this, we all need someone that takes the time to sit down and say how are you doing. At this point we are so low, and our thoughts are so dark, we can't see a way out and so need someone to offer a hand to help us. Stress is a horrible thing and with all the pressures of work, it wouldn't take much for someone to do something that they would not normally do.

Has anyone asked her how the changes have affected her? Was she involved in the changes? I know when I have to give in I feel very guilty as I feel that it impacts on the rest of the team, and this makes me feel worse. It's a huge thing to ask for help, as we all like to think we are just getting on, and we don't want to burden anyone else with our worries. We don't see how we are, is affecting everyone else.

Never mind how your relationship is - it just takes one person to say - have a cup of tea and lets sit down and chat about how you are doing. How can the team help you. Don't just sit by - mentioning dignitas may have been her way of letting someone know she is struggling and wanting help. It sounds that if she has been always like this, she has never been given the opportunity and the skills to deal with stress, workload and all the feelings that come with that.

It's a dark cave, and without someone to shine a light - no one can get out. Talk to her.