Bullying at work

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:48:11 GMT

it's weird isn't it? I had no idea my sis felt like she did, the thing is she still is and I am like but you are my sister, what the hell are you jealous of? I am not a jealous person but I knew my sis was, but did not think her jealousy extended to me.

Re: Bullying at work

Mac Feather — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:42:14 GMT

There was also a girl I knew that always took the mick out of me and at times went over the score with her comments and hurt me from time to time if Im honest. She got drunk one night and confessed she wished she was married like me! Could have knocked me over with a feather.

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:37:37 GMT

Thats very true Heather..my own sister was jelous of me for years and I never even knew until she told me one day.. i was gobsmacked

Re: Bullying at work

Mac Feather — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:28:30 GMT

Just goes to show though that we dont know what goes through peoples minds.

Re: Bullying at work

Saskia Quinn — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:21:27 GMT

dont put yourself down Heather!

Living on a sheep farm and seeing the birth of the lovely lambs AND having gorgeous working collie dogs????

Mmmm.........maybe I could be jealous!!

Re: Bullying at work

Mac Feather — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:13:27 GMT

One person I worked with in veterinary circles was seriously dogmatic- her way was the only way to do things and quite forceful with it, often aggressive. Turns out she had issues and was actually quite jealous of other people. I was taken aback coz I mean who on earth would be jealous of me!!!!!!!!!

Re: Bullying at work

Saskia Quinn — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:06:15 GMT

[quote user="heather mac"]

I kinda wonder if some people have had a hard time at work then then they kinda treat other people the same way. Not true of all people. Maybe Im just talking nonsense.

[/quote]

Like Sandra said, you do have a point there Heather. Maybe they have never knew any other way?

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:03:27 GMT

Heather, you definitely have a point there

Re: Bullying at work

Mac Feather — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:02:02 GMT

I kinda wonder if some people have had a hard time at work then then they kinda treat other people the same way. Not true of all people. Maybe Im just talking nonsense.

Re: Bullying at work

Saskia Quinn — Sun, 10 May 2009 11:00:06 GMT

Katy, that is a true story of success and what we are all capable of.

I am sure a lot of people on here will take inspiration from that! I know I have

Re: Bullying at work

katy coleman — Sun, 10 May 2009 10:57:36 GMT

o god this story was mine 12yrs ago when i first went into practice. i stayed for 2 yrs and developed a stomach ulcer due to the stress. i eventually just left to work in a shop so i could get my head right again. after a year out i went back into practice, qualified and am now head nurse at a brilliant practice.

i used to cry everyday before i went to work and agin when i finished and sometimes whilst i was there. i was frightened all the time, he would throw things and shout at you constantly and i am only a small person and he was huge (tall and wide)

He would constantly tell us we were useless and that we should be grateful to him for employing us as no one else would have us, which sounds ridiculous but if someone tells you something enough times you believe it.

My advice now would be to get out, there are always other jobs believe me. and secondly sue the pants off him. get the doctor to sign you off and make sure he puts down the reason why. believe me it won't affect getting other jobs if you explain to future employers what you were put through, i thought the same but it really did not make any difference.

Good luck i have complete sympathy for you reading your story has taken me back 12yrs and i can still remember the terror i felt. i hoped that things like this didn't happen any more but obviously they do.

good luck x

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Sun, 10 May 2009 01:20:42 GMT

Jan, I get it now

Re: Bullying at work

jan — Sun, 10 May 2009 01:17:58 GMT

Is there anyone out there who hasn't been treated unfairly, bullied or treated like a c\\\\\\\\ at work?! I approached my Principal who I have known for 20 years today with a quite legitimate complanaint from our new Grad. I am not a "softie" when it come to new staff but he had been treated like a piece of s****, & my Heros resonse was I had to put up with it, I dont feel guilty for expecting Him to cope. I had too so so should you

This is wrong Are we breeding a culture of bulling?

Re: Bullying at work

Sammyannieantha — Sat, 09 May 2009 14:22:56 GMT

how dare he treat u like that, what an A-hole!!i wud go to another practice hunny then u can put 2 fingers up and never have to look at his miserable face again!!dont give up xx

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Wed, 06 May 2009 19:25:54 GMT

Catmad you should have just asked, you should have told them what a great place they had, and if ever they were looking to give you a call, at least that way it's more casual rather than coming right out and asking for a job.

Re: Bullying at work

Catmad — Tue, 05 May 2009 21:58:53 GMT

I went to another vets in the area as i'm looking after someone kitties whilst their owners are away.

It's quite a big practice with lots and lots of QVNs, and the 2 vets I have met so far both seem really nice. Always makes me giggle when you have had to manhandle a cat you have taken to another vets... They are all really impressed til you confess you work at a vets. Then spent 10 minutes discussing the benefits of buster collars - lol.

Back to the story,,,, I was going to ask if there were any jobs going, but chickened out at the last min - doh.

Might see how this job app goes that i've already applied for and then ring round other practices.

Re: Bullying at work

Katie Johnston — Tue, 05 May 2009 20:33:53 GMT

Hi Catmad,

I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone. I have just left a practice with very similar circumstances only it was the bosses and 1 of the nurses that were being nasty and bullying. I can tell you that if you do decide to find another practice and leave your current one you will feel so much better. I have not yet found another practice as in Northern Ireland there are few vacancies for a student nurse but i am looking and i know i will find something but i know that myself and our wonderful qualified nurse who left before i did due to the bullying both felt for about a week that we could never work in practice again after our experiences there. But after that week you start to miss the other side....the animals and the owners and you realise you have been very unfortunate to be a punching bag for someone elses problems and i can tell you that i have been fortunate enough to work for some fabulous vets and even better nurses and we have worked for the small percentage that give good vet clinics a bad name!

Keep you chin up and do you know what, smile at him and show him you are not one bit worried about anything he has said even when you are. Then go and look at the animals in your kennels cause its them you are helping not him! You will get through all this i promise, there is some very good advise in the previous comments but do take action and also do listen to your doctor. Your health is the most important thing and your friends at work will more than agree with that,

Good luck with whatever action you take,

Katie x

Re: Bullying at work

Saskia Quinn — Tue, 05 May 2009 19:41:15 GMT

Ian,

I would also like to say what a nice post that was and I hope it proves to help Catmad to improve the situation, and indeed, to others who may be suffering similar.

Re: Bullying at work

Catmad — Tue, 05 May 2009 19:32:31 GMT

Thanks Ian and everyone.

Luckily I am at the branch practice tomorrow, so good chance of not seeing him at all.

I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow.

Re: Bullying at work

Practice Manager — Tue, 05 May 2009 17:28:36 GMT

Hi catmad

Having read all of this thread I think its time to look at your options for sorting this out properly.

Firstly lets start with the basics.

Employment law no longer allows employers to bully staff in the way they always have. Tribunals tend to look on it in a dim fashion and since the beginning of April they now have the power to increase any tribunal award by up to 25% if they deem it necessary.

This means that as an employer the practice principle should know all this and act in the correct and appropriate manner.

Just because all the staff have a problem doesnt mean they will do anything unless they think they can win. No one wants to stick theyre neck out if they can help it.

Under no circumstances must you drop to his level. That means no name and shame, no swearing back and no exploding temper. Your best option is simply to walk away and leave the room. If confronted about why, you only need to say -

"You do not want to talk to him because he is upsetting and scaring you with his temper".

This will shock many people into realising they have gone to far. It may then allow for a calm discussion either at that time or at a later date when you are ready.

If it does not shock him and he does not stop the temper tantrum at that point then you really are better out of that situation. If this is the case then I would seek immediate employment else where and also contact an employment tribunal immediately.

What I would say to you (and this is no defence), is that there are liable to be pressures behind the outbursts and that there may be either problems at home, in the business or in some other area that you may not be aware of.

I have dealt with all levels of staffing when they have lost their temper or acted inappropriately towards other staff and I can say that calm mediation is always the best option. You do not have to do this alone you can request a meeting and take a friend or colleague if you need to. However if you do nothing not only sdo you let yourself down you will then let the next person down that he goes onto bully.

If you need to talk more about this please fell free to email me or reply to this thread. Hopefully a solution can be found to sort out this problem..

Thanks

Ian Thompson

Practice Manager

www.ashfieldveterinarygroup.co.uk

Practice Management Consultant

www.practicemanagementconsultancy.com

Re: Bullying at work

Anonymous — Sat, 02 May 2009 20:42:58 GMT

Oops, should say pleasure in the last bit!

Re: Bullying at work

Anonymous — Sat, 02 May 2009 20:42:07 GMT

This guy (unfortunately) sounds a LOT like my old boss... emphasis on the old part there! In the end I got sick of the constant criticism for things I had/hadn't done (despite following what other vets had asked me to do) and I also used to dread working the nights at the branch surgery where I would be with him. The worst part was that he was the head vet, and his partner was practice manager, making it very difficult to raise issues. Also, because it was a small practice, it was usually one vet and one support staff member doing a consult block, so if he was in a bad mood I took the brunt of it.

As I say, he is my OLD boss... I took the plunge, left and went somewhere else. I took a slight pay cut, but I think that being happy to go into work and having a great team working with me more than made up for that. Looking back, I can't believe I lasted as long as I did, but then again I know people who are still there now several years on. The way I look at it is that he lost out in the end - I got on very well with the clients and I don't think he realised how much I did behind the scenes to keep everything 'front of house' running smoothly.

Don't let one arrogant *$%^ (choose your own expletive!) ruin your career - apply somewhere else, and take a GREAT amount of please in handing in your notice letter detailing exactly why you have decided to move on - I know I did.

Jenny

Re: Bullying at work

Fiona Leathers — Sat, 02 May 2009 17:01:09 GMT

I think the total twat applies first & foremost!!

Re: Bullying at work

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Sat, 02 May 2009 00:53:44 GMT

If he is shouting at clients (his bread and butter) then he is either very well off(probably) or mentally ill (also probably) or just a total twat with ideas of grandeur (also probably) so take your pick

Seriously though is he maybe having a breakdown or is he like this all the time?

Re: Bullying at work

Catmad — Fri, 01 May 2009 22:07:00 GMT

Some of the things he was trying to pull yesterday were pretty shocking.

I feel like I want clarification on certain procedures, as he pretty much said that the way we deal with PDSA claims is completely wrong. Even though we've dealt with them the same way since i've worked there.

He then shouted at a client, and then shouted at another vet on the phone.

It is like dealing with a schitzophrenic the way he is behaving. I think he has got the mental problem. Never mind me.