Would you help a stranger

Re: Would you help a stranger

Kerry Spain — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 10:49:14 GMT

I've never been put in the position where I have to help somebody else, I'd like to think I would intevene and help depending on the circumstances.

I have however, been in a few sticky situations my self. 1 incident happened about 7 years ago and the other just a few weeks ago. On both accounts people have tried to mug me. Yes, TRIED. , I have that sort of personality where 99% of the time I'm chilled, the other 1% I need to be restrained in a straight jacket. No one, I repeat NO ONE helped me. The first time it was 1 man who tried to take my hand bag and shopping bags off me, the second was on Piccadilly met stop 3 blokes this time.

They got away with nothing, in fact they where the ones who looked frightened and buggered off in the end with me chasing them! LOL

In fact to just let you know I'm at work now with a can of illegal pepper spray in my pocket and a knife in the other one. I light of all the robberies happening in the Manchester area at the moment I'm not being a victim. Some of my friends think I'm mad but if people keep getting away with mugging and robbing then they will do it all the more.

Re: Would you help a stranger

Haley Thomas — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 09:48:07 GMT

I heard a story where a man was watching gang violence on a victim. There were too many of them for him to stand in, so he pulled out his mobile phone and recorded it all. They got charged because of the mans evidence!!!

Re: Would you help a stranger

Dippy — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 09:06:13 GMT

Maybe something that everyone can take on board if they are ever in one of these situations and feel unable to help, is to take as much detail as possible about the attackers. It doesn't help the victim at the time but might at least result in a prosecution or anyone else becoming their next victim!

Re: Would you help a stranger

Dippy — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 09:03:35 GMT

Anyone remember the case of the nurse in Manchester a few years ago who was stabbed to death when she intervened and tried to help another woman who was being threatened by a guy in the street? This is what scares me. I'd always go to a safe place and call the police immediately but not sure I'd wade in and try to stop it with so many knives and guns being carried these days. And kids seem to be the worst for this!

I watched the programme and it scared me to death. The only thing I could've thought of on the bus was if the woman and her mates and a few other passengers had joined forces and charged the gang, aming enough noise to scare them. I don't think one person alone would have come off well and it's that sort of gang mentalitly where a knife is likely to be produced.

It's a horrible horrible situation to find yourself in and a sad state of affair that many of us think like this these days but sadly, it's only from hearing about other good samaritans who have been injured or killed when trying to help. However, we would all like to think that if we were ever unfortunate enough to be the victim, someone would come to our aid but I'm just not sure it's true and situations like this are easy to speculate about until you find yourself actually there in that split second without time to think or assess properly.

Re: Would you help a stranger

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 20:33:35 GMT

Carrie, I am the same, I think the only thing that would make me think twice would be a gun. But like you,if it's a child I dont think I could stop myself, I would be imagining it was one of mine , and can you imagine that happening to one of your own, and no one stepping into help.It does not bear thinking about.

Re: Would you help a stranger

carrie ball — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 20:09:47 GMT

didn't see the program, but if the odds are stacked against the victim i will stand up for them, if it is a child being attacked doubly so. i hate bullies and lose all fear when there is someone that really needs help. gosh i feel like i should have an s on my shirt lol!

Re: Would you help a stranger

Mrs Dot Dot — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 19:37:08 GMT

I think you can never honestly say how you would react until you are in a situation..... I would like to say that I would definately help out in any circmstances but I think you can never be sure. I do know that I am the sort of person that reacts instinctively... if someone needs help I will offer, try and help, wade in etc regardless and then think about the consequences afterwards but I have never really been faced with a serious situation.

Re: Would you help a stranger

Mac Feather — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 14:32:30 GMT

Think its one of those questions i couldnt truely answer, i would like to think i could help but it all depends on the situation, very thought provoking question indeed!

Re: Would you help a stranger

loobylou — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 13:56:35 GMT

I agree that it would depend a lot on the situation in front of me. If I could help without putting myself in danger then I would like to think I would step in.
If I was in danger myself then I wouldnt stand back and do nothing but would phone for help.

Re: Would you help a stranger

Sandra Taylor RVN, MBVNA — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 13:52:26 GMT

Hi Steph,

I totally understand the domestic situation, a lot of people dont want to get involved purely because 99% time the couple are all loved up the following day, and you end up being the bad one for "interfering". Although I dont know if I could watch a man beating up a women, pushing yes, I would probably not interfere, but if he was beating the crap out of her, then no I definitely would not stand by and do nothing.

My eldest daughter is pretty much of the same temprement as me, and I am constantly saying to her, if she sees a situation, not to get involved, and I only say this as I dont want her hurt, even though I know myself I would not stand back.

2 weeks ago my daughter stopped a guy from beating up one of her friends, they were a couple and he started to hit her, my daughter stood in between them to start with and told him to leave her alone, he refused and tried to hit my daughter....... I will say at this point my daughter does Thai Boxing, and she decked him, he got back up and tried to hit her again, and she decked him again, he did not try to hit her a third time. She told me this, and I told her she should not have got involved, again I was only thinking of her safety, but on the other token I am glad she stood up for her friend, and put the boyfriend well and truly on his ass.

Re: Would you help a stranger

StephSVN — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 13:25:10 GMT

Didn't watch the programme, but this is something I often wonder about too. I have personally experienced 2 very different situations, and reacted differently in both.

I was once on a bus in Birmingha when an older gentleman got on with blood pouring down his face, it was mostly covering his glasses so he could barely see, and he was walking with a stick. No-one on the bus did anything at all, even th driver just took his money then set off before he had even found a seat. The bus was full, the poor man took the only remaining seat, so it was a lot of people who did nothing. I offered him a tissue to help clean his face, and asked if he was ok. It turned out he had fallen into a bush just next to the bus stop, and the blood was all coming from what turned out to be just a scratch - the only real damage was to his pride. I was, and remain, apalled by everyone simple ignoring him.

The other situation, where I did not react, was during a domestic between my next door neighbours. This couple had not lived there very long, but we had already heard numerous very loud arguments, with both parties giving as good as they got. On this particualr occaision, they had fallen out prevuiously resulting in the guy leaving for a few days, then he came back and tried to force his way in, resulting in another major row, in the back garden which borders onto our garden with the back doors facing each other. At one point, I saw the guy push the girl, and she was hysterically crying, and begging him to leave etc. She saw me through the window, and asked for help...I honestly did not know what to do, there is no way I could have physically helped against the man, and to be honest was slightly scared of him beofre hand. In the end I did nothing, he got into the ouse, took some stuff and left. I felt almost sick with guilt following this episode - until 2 days later when he had moved back in and they were happily back together...

The point I am trying to make is that every situation isdifferent, and unless you are there, in the heat of the moment, you have no idea how to react. I like to think that if I did ever see someone being attacked in the street, I would at least phone the police. And if it was somebody injured, with no 'attacker' present, as was the case with the man on the bus - I see no reason why people would not help, surely being afraid is not an excuse?

I remember a few years ago now seeing on the news the story of a man who had throat cut on the back of a bus by a boy as he got off - still nobody did anything, even though the boy had gone and the bus had set off, the man managed to drag himself to the front where the driver then phoned an ambulance as he collaped...luckily he survived.