Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Dippy — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 18:50:47 GMT

Hi Jenny

Many thanks for the advice and sorry I didn't reply sooner but am still recovering from my missed night's sleep on Sunday (the Cyprus fundraiser/Gaol night) and am still absolutely cream crackered!

Have had several different versions of the reason for her outburst but they all seem to make sense and i personally think there were probably a combination of factors which triggered it plus your reasoning about her being hand reared also makes sense in the way in which she reacted. having read Vicky Halls' excellent cat behaviour book about dealing with various types of aggression and also taken on board the advice given by yourself and my boss, the action plan seems to be much the same and in several areas eg distancing myself a little from her, distraction techniques, Feliway/Zylkene etc etc. So far so good. She has still been picking on the other one as per usual although have now found much less intrusive ways of distraction which seem to be working and she's learning that my lap is not here for her 24-7. The hardest thing has been not having little converstions with her every time I enter the room as she's so vocal and I always give her a running commentary of what I'm doing (bonkers I know but have always talked to my animals non stop when they're alone in the house with me!) She's so chirrupy and I always reply so am having to work hard to remember to ignore her sometimes but I think the trust is slowly being rebuilt on both sides - we were both noticeably wary around each other for a few days and if I'm honest, I was plain scared of her being near me for the first 48hrs which is what upset me most as we have been so close but I now realise that that was probably half the problem. Other factors may be that we have 2 new kittens in the garden who come and peer in through the back door and wind her up plus the cat she picks on was always joined at the hip to my dog and he used to break up any squabbles but since he was pts last summer, she's also become quite clingy around me and this may also have caused some jealousy.

Anyway, will continue with the "programme" and may well be back for more advice but hopefully not as serious as last week!

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Jenny T — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 15:31:48 GMT

Hi Dippy,

How are you getting on?

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Jenny T — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 23:06:03 GMT

Oh Dippy you poor thing.What a terrible experience for you. I'm not surprised you are so worried.

From reading your post I think the root cause is related to the hand-rearing. It is a known occurance in hand-reared animals that you can get this type of extreme aggression. I've even heard of it in hand-reared llamas!

The problem relates to the animal's ability to deal with frustration. The mother normally teaches the young animal to deal with frustration during the weaning process (ie there is also a behavioural component to the weaning process). So the animal goes from a state of getting everything on demand, to a situation where it is denied milk. This is the first point where the animal is denied anything. Learning to deal with the frustration this situation causes is vitally important to an animal.

Contrast this to a hand-rearing situation. In this case we do not offer milk and then refuse to give it to the animal (as does mother). Rather, we give the baby what it wants when it wants it (we are usually just really pleased it is eating well). The animal therefore does not get this first important lesson with dealing with frustration. It is probably never denied anything.

These animals, as adults, can therefore have difficulty when they are placed in situations where their wants are not met on demand. They may not have learned coping strategies for dealing with frustration. These animals can then, in their frustration at not getting what they want, resort to aggression (and this can often be extreme).

Sounds like this may be your situation. The frustration causing situation appears to be attention from you, especially if there is competition from other cats in the home.

Dealing with the problem- Not an easy one. You have 2 choices. Either don't put the cat in a frustrating situation (ie give it everything it wants on demand), or try and teach the cat how to deal with these situations. I would not recommend the first option as you may then make the situation worse by reinforcing the unwanted behaviour. The second option though is not a simple thing. A "normal" frustrated cat may well try harder to get what it wants, or if it is all too much will run away. Your cat may well savage you instead!

Firstly be aware of the difficult times and take action before trouble starts. If you have 2 cats wanting your attention and one of them is naughty cat, then move away, put one cat in a different room etc. Don't let the situation escalate.

Then I think we have to try and teach naughty cat to deal with frustrating situations. Do this when it is just you and this cat together. if other cats are around they may well get beaten up. Start with just mildly frustrating situations eg wait a few moments before giving a meal or attention etc. Don't give attention every time is is demanded. Take it very slowly so the cat has time to learn to deal with this. Progress slowly and see if you can eventually reach a point where you can say no to something safely. Stop immediately if the cat shows signs of distress or aggression. End the encounter and walk away. Next time go back to something you know the cat can deal with and try again from that point.

I hope this is helpful and makes sense. Bit tired at the moment and fighting a chest infection!!

Jenny T.

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Anonymous — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 16:59:00 GMT

awww dippy i'm so sorry to read your story, that is really not like her at all! i hope she sorts herself out! xxxx

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Dippy — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 11:34:48 GMT

Well so far so good - she's been like a different cat for the past 2 days since the additional Feliways and Zylkene. I've also been trying to distance myself a little by breaking the routine and not letting her climb on me all the time and not letting her into every room I go into etc. Last night she spent the evening sitting alone in our bedroom by the radiator even though the door to the lounge was open and she could have come in which is not like her. Perhaps she doesn't entirely trust me either now after the other morning. I must admit I'm slightly wary around her at the moment which makes me really sad as we had a realy close bod but perhaps that's the route of the problem - it's just sucH a novelty to have a lap cat that I've encouraged it but perhaps too much.Time will tell I guess as I'm at home all weekend so will see whether the chaos starts up again when I sit down to watch telly later.

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Saskia Quinn — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 10:36:32 GMT

just bringing this to the top again

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

anji jonas — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 21:11:10 GMT

crikey! - hope you get some resolution to this hun - it sounds awful.

one of our cats used to have a bit of a split personality and would attack if you made a wrong move (friends did stop coming over for a while she was so bad . we never resolved it and im sad to admit we breathed a sigh of relief when she moved in with a neighbour (of her own choice!) she is now apparrently fine but is an only cat... maybe that was what she needed..?

all the best, i hope you get sorted.

A.x

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Dippy — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 21:05:03 GMT

Thanks all. Hopefully Jenny T may read this when she's next on here. Have come home armed with additional Feliway diffusers and Zylkene. Had a long chat with my boss who's also really into behavioural and he seems to think it's more likely redirected aggression but probably not helped by my funny voice, eg she turned on me after I broke up the scrapping already underway. Have got lots of tips, am now putting them into practice to try and reduce the over attachment to me and have distraction techniques for punch ups(safe ones) . Also have two nice big holes in my face. I feel so embarrassed that I'm now scared of my own cutest cat in the world but as my mum says, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Saskia Quinn — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 20:05:23 GMT

Dippy, thats a terrible experience, that must have been very scary!

Do what Carolyn said and contact Jenny T.

Good luck, keep us posted.

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

dinkyd — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 19:51:49 GMT

Not much help but a few months ago we had a client ring up hysterical because her cat wouldnt let her out the bathroom she had jsut come out the shower and couldnt even get dressed!She had also rung in to work to say she would be late cos the cat had trapped her!So she rang us for help while being trapped in the bathroom- but dont think we managed to give her much help!

Didnt sound as bad as your cat though.

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Caro Laithwaite VN — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 10:53:47 GMT

Ask Jenny T and if you have a video handy and try the voice again she would find that helpful. Also send her a log of the interaction between all the cats when what happens and times and exactly what happens and a floor plan of the house as well. with furniture and everything marked on just in outline.

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Dippy — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 08:47:13 GMT

We've just had a cuddle and made up, she's been sat on my lap purring and being very loving although still looks a bit confused about what just happened. I'm fairly sure that it was my fault for making that noise but am now worrying that if I ever accidently make that noise at something on the telly or anything else, she may do it again! She's kind of a like a dog who is protective of her owner which I'm assuming is possibly due to me hand rearing her. She's the most loving cuddly lap cat usually (on her terms obviously) and very attached to me but the trouble only ever starts when I'm around and they all want mummy!

Ah well, the war wounds will be a story to tell at work later

Re: Urgent help re feline behaviour problem

Katy — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 08:40:35 GMT

Oh god. Sounds a bit dodgy. Especially as she had you pinned in the corner.

Hopefully one of the behaviour experts on here will be able to help.